As we go through life we sometimes encounter bumps in the road we must endure before moving on. Sometimes we are not sure how to handle the bumps and sometimes we just need to talk to someone just to get it off our chest. “Frustrated Network Marketer–If I listen Without Judgement Could You Do The Same?” deals with this issue and explains why we never move forward but let it fester within.
I recently read an article in a local newspaper about a 21 year old woman. She was a very intelligent and compassionate. Many people appreciated her genuine and forgiving nature. She helped anyone she could but there were those that took advantage of her and others scorned her for her wonderful attitude and generosity. She was hurt over the scorning and attitude of others and kept it all inside. It built up to the point where she committed suicide to end the pain she felt. The picture in the article showed her with her “bestest friend” who was a much younger child. Her friendship to a much younger child can be easily explained. Children tend to accept you as you are without judging you for who you are or are not. She may be gone but it leaves us to wonder what contribution she may have made to this world in need. WE WILL NEVER KNOW!
How does this relate to network marketing? Network marketers also hit bumps in the road both in life and business. Sometimes these bumps seem impassable leaving us to think what can we do to move on. Do you have anyone you can turn to? On a recent call one of the contributors made this comment “We sometimes never talk to anyone because we don’t want others to know our business or what skeletons we have in the closet.” The deep down fear is we are afraid of being judged by others. One of the hardest things for a person is to listen to another without judging them. Since this seems to be normal for society we tend to keep it all inside where it festers over time.
Not everything can be discussed with a spouse or partner. In the case of network marketing there may not be that spousal or partner support for the business. Talking to them may be of no advantage because they lack the experience of what you are going through and may even be opposed to this type of business so they have already prejudged the situation.
It is best to find someone or a group which you can talk about anything whether it is related to business or life in general. They must be trustworthy and make you feel safe during the discussion and knowing they will be looking out for your best interests. Sometimes hearing others gives you a different perspective which may contain the answer you yourself need to solve a dilemma.
There will need to be some considerations when talking to your mastermind group of 2 or more.
- The discussion needs to be kept confidential which in turn leads to an open dialogue within a safe harbour.
- There cannot be an aspect that makes another feel they are being judged.
- You will need to build a strong relationship so you can understand others paradigms.
- You cannot impose your paradigms on others.
- You will need to listen to another or others from their point of view (paradigm). Put yourself in their shoes to better understand who they are.
- Only give advice when asked (you will be able to tell if you are truly listening.)
- When advice is given make sure you are advising towards a win/win ending.
- Sometimes you will be required to listen and nothing else. Don’t spoil the dialogue by interjecting.
- Ask questions to make sure you truly understand the situation. Sometimes the questions will lead you to the root of the problem.
- Show the other person you are truly trying to understand them from their paradigm and not yours.
- Be prepared to have the discussion open up to a deeper level as you truly try to understand the other person.
- Do not let advice given or taken ruin the relationship because you disagree but learn from another’s point of view and always be prepared to learn something new.
To learn more about how to relate to others and how to share your ideas I would recommend you read the book “The Habits Of Highly Effective People” by Stephen R. Covey. This book will inspire you to look deep within yourself and begin a motion towards relating to others from their paradigms. Looking at the world trough the eyes of others. Frustrated Network Marketer–If I listen Without Judgement Could You Do The Same?
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Dave and Darlene Mills
Leadership With A Vision
"You cannot teach a man anything. You can only help him discover it within himself." — Galileo